A Day in the Life of a Vending Machine
My daily schedule since arriving here goes like this…
It starts early in the morning in front of the inn. I don’t have to rest at night, but I recently learned how to go into sleep mode, which lets me consume only half the usual points. It’s no problem at all if I don’t sleep, but for some reason it feels good when I wake up.
“Good morning, Boxxo!”
I hear Lammis’s voice, full of life even this early. These days, she’s been mostly wearing the inn’s worker uniform.
To catch you up, Boxxo seems to be my name now. Lammis was the one who christened me, obviously. When she heard the innkeeper’s daughter, Munami, calling me “Box,” she said it didn’t sound cute, so she named me Boxxo instead.
I have some doubts about her naming sense, to be honest, but with how happy her face looked at the time, there was really nothing I could do but accept it with a “Welcome.”
“Let’s do our best again today!”
“Welcome.”
As she wipes me down with a cloth, she starts talking to me like always. I feel like she’s more cut out to be an employee at the inn than a hunter risking life and limb for money, but I’m sure she has her own thoughts on that.
With both of us preparing to work hard again today, I drop a sports drink—a new product I started stocking a few days ago—into my compartment.
“Is it okay to have another one today?”
“Welcome.”
“Thanks!”
Just looking at her drinking it so happily gives my mechanical body a warm feeling. I think.
Lately, I’ve learned a lot about my new body—the inner workings of the vending machine—and I figured out how to give items for free.
Every nook and cranny of my body is clean, sparkling in the morning sun. Now I’m ready for another full day of work.
A few minutes after she goes back inside the inn, my regulars appear in front of me.
“Welcome.”
“Yes, good morning. I just can’t start the day without having some of this soup.”
“You too, Granny? I love this sweet tea so much that I can’t get motivated without drinking some.”
“You’ve got it all wrong. Water is best in the morning. A bottle of it to wake you up is the greatest feeling.”
An old married couple and a skinny young man are chatting.
From what I recall, the old couple makes a living teaching hunters how to train and use their Blessings. Rumor has it they were both incredibly skilled hunters back in their heyday.
The young man is son and heir to a nearby tool shop and always comes to the cafeteria on the first floor of the inn to eat when lunchtime rolls around. According to Lammis, he has a thing for the innkeeper’s poster girl, Munami.
“Thank you. Please come again.”
I give my usual thanks to the three of them and watch as they walk away.
Then, as though they timed it right when they went out of sight, four stalwart men appear.
“Phew. Glad the night shift’s over with. What should I have today?”
“Welcome.”
It’s Karios’s group, the number-one contributors to my sales. They’re in charge of the settlement’s gates as well as peacekeeping inside them. All four frequently come by when their shifts change.
As usual, they purchase their beverages and pressed potato chips, then head out. Now is when I have free time. Incidentally, I don’t stock cans of oden when I’m in front of the inn in the morning. They provide breakfast inside, and I don’t want to interfere with their business.
After the start of business in the morning, customers become more irregular, coming in bit by bit. My prices are a little high, and only so many regularly buy anything. Most customers buy two or three things a week.
A little before noon, groups of people equipped with armor and weapons start to appear from the direction of the local branch of the Hunters Association.
“We’ll be back before tomorrow, but don’t forget to buy some water. If you have room in your pockets, buy a can of cooked food or a red tube, too.”
“Um, how do you buy things from this?”
“You don’t know? Guess I’ll have to teach you.”
A man with a stubbly beard dressed in black armor, who seems to be the group’s leader, explains the process to them a little boastfully. I remember him—he came to the vending machine four days ago, timing it so that nobody else was around, timid and trembling as he bought items.
He practiced this beforehand. Mysteriously, his stern features have somehow started seeming cute to me.
My products are airtight and disappear immediately after use, making them popular among hunters heading out to explore or to slay monsters. Female hunters seem to love the tea, and I’ve heard rumors that they’ve split up into a lemon-tea side and a milk-tea side.
I’ve been offering coffee, too, but it’s not very popular. One or two of my customers are passionate about it, though, so I won’t pull it, but I might want to exchange it for café au lait.
This is the time when hunters who often sleep late come shopping, so I usually put the cans of oden back on sale.
When noon comes around, I pull the oden again. This is the busiest time for the inn’s cafeteria, so I set to work attracting customers by saying “Welcome” to bring as many inside for lunch as I can. And I never forget to send them off with a “Thank you” when they’re finished eating.
Once lunchtime is over and foot traffic becomes scarce, I can’t miss something small moving around in my peripheral vision.
The little rascal is here again. There is a girl who will basically always come around this time of day. Just the sight of her light-brown twin-tails makes the kid look sassy. She’s probably around ten years old.
Her clothing is fairly well tailored compared to the rest of the settlement’s. She seems like the quintessential spoiled highborn girl.
Wooden walls may surround the place, but monsters are on the prowl beyond them—the settlement can’t be called safe by any stretch of the imagination. At first, I couldn’t help finding it odd that a child like her is here, but apparently, she’s the granddaughter of a wealthy merchant who runs a large, stone-built shop here.
I noticed her only a few days ago, but she seems to be strolling about the settlement as she pleases, though several bodyguards always follow at a distance. Well, I only know they’re bodyguards because one of the black-clothed men tailing her once bought a milk tea from me and complained about her.
“Lady Suori’s tomboyish attitude is such a pain,” he said. “If she were a little more ladylike, our jobs would be so much easier.”
At the time, I sympathized with the man in black, but now I just want to shout at him to discipline her properly. This Suori brat is far beyond the realm of just being playful.
When I first saw her, she was staring at me mesmerized. When I invited her with a “Welcome,” she muttered, “My plan to be the first one to talk and have an advantage in negotiations has failed!” and ran away. When I heard her voice, I realized it was the girl Lammis had saved. That surprised me. At the time, I couldn’t see her face very well under her hat.
The problems started the next day. If she had stayed far away to puff out her cheeks and glare at me, that would have been fine. But she picked up a stone at her feet and threw it at me for some unknown reason. A weak girl throwing a rock at me didn’t even scratch me, but it made me mad. Still, I decided to overlook it, since she was a little kid, but then we come to the day after that.
She came right up to me with a bag on her shoulder. I thought she was about to buy something, but instead, she dumped a pile of pebbles out of her bag and into my compartment. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back, so at my loudest volume, I said:
“Insert coins.”
The up-close shout seemed to startle her. She fell right onto her backside.
“H-how rude! Who…? Just wh-who do you think I am, huh?!”
She spoke in an odd tone of voice but looked crazy angry. Then four men and women in black jumped out and grabbed her. It wasn’t a fun sight to behold.
She cried out for someone to destroy me, but the people in black dragged her away and things settled down. But that’s when the situation went downhill.
Apparently, Suori’s a very prideful girl and wouldn’t forgive me for frightening her. Her pranks got worse by the day. Once, she tried to throw a paint-like substance onto me, but I surprised her again and it ended up all over her. Another time, she tried to damage me with a thick branch, but she tripped and started crying. None of it had gone well for her, but it was too much for me to laugh off as though she were only pretending to be some brave warrior.
I’m on my guard for what she’ll bring to the table today…but she’s got her head down, plodding along on her lonely way. It would be a great performance if she was faking it, but I don’t think a kid with such an easy-to-read personality could pull off an act that clever.
Hmm… She’s standing in front of me, but she’s not trying to pull any pranks, right? The young girl just stands there, staring without seeing. When she looks up, I can see red around her eyes like she’s been crying. Maybe there was some trouble at home.
Seeing someone who’s normally annoyingly energetic looking so down—it makes me want to do something for her. I guess that’s human nature. All right, all right. Time to show her a grown-up’s generosity.
I’ll look through my list of items and pick something I think a kid would like. Orange juice should be appropriate—and not 100 percent or anything, but the kind with a lot of sugar.
I guess that means going with that one famous maker from the commercials. Here we go. I stock the orange juice for the first time and drop one into my compartment.
“Huh? What was that?”
“Welcome.”
It’s my treat today, young lady. Next time, use your own money to buy one like before.
“Is it okay for me to have it for free?”
Isn’t that a cute face? Holding her orange juice all surprised like that. She’s always wearing an angry, sulking, or pouting face, but things look hopeful for her future.
“U-um, thank you.”
“Please come again.”
Before evening sets in, Lammis puts me on her back and carries me to the gate. It had been inconvenient to carry me around in her arms, so she bought a modified wooden rack for carrying loads, allowing her to move me around much more smoothly.
I stand quietly after Lammis gently places me next to the gate. At night, I always stay here until the cafeteria and pub at the inn close up. The inn’s mistress bought a large quantity of pressed potato chips and cans of oden, too, providing them as snacks to go with their drinks.
Out of gratitude to the inn for taking such good care of me, as a sort of payment, I mark everything down to half price whenever the mistress buys from me.
“Phew, it’s cold out. Oh, you get something new again? Wait, the blue button means it’s a cool one, right? It looks good, but I’ll pass. I’ll just get the usual soup.”
“I’ll have the warm sweet tea.”
“Wait! There was warm sweet tea in here?! Damn, I’ll buy that after.”
I have stocked a warm version of the milk tea, so thank you for your patronage.
I’m thankful that Karios and Gorth both buy quite a bit every time Lammis brings me by, but I worry about how their wallets are doing. I hear the gatekeepers have a considerable income, though, so they’ll probably be fine… Of course, maybe it’s stranger for me to worry about them when I’m the reason they’re spending all their money.
I’m positioned next to the gate only partly because those tending it think so highly of my products—another big factor is that for some reason, there’s been this superstition going around that the frog fiends never attack while I’m here.
“Boxxo! Time to go home!”
Oh, Lammis is calling. Is she finished with her shift at the inn? That means the end of my workday, too.
The warm beverages that the two guards bought are my last sales of the day.
Lammis places me on the wooden harness again, then easily lifts me with strength that’s unimaginable from only looking at her slight frame. The two of us—one girl and one machine—head back toward the inn from the gate.
“We had a funny customer at the inn today. She’s a hunter. It’s her first time going into the labyrinth, and she was really energetic and about the same age as me.”
“Welcome.”
Come to think of it, how old is Lammis actually? I assumed she’s around fifteen or sixteen, but she could actually be a little younger or older than that.
“How was your day, Boxxo?”
“Get one free with a winner.”
“It was fun? I hope you can talk a whole lot someday. But first I have to save up money so we can go see Hulemy soon. When we do, I’m sure you’ll learn how to do lots of new things!”
She feels indebted to me for saving her life and is trying her hardest for me, but I’m the one who had been saved. If not for Lammis, I’d be broken down right on that lakeside by now.
I’m the one who should be grateful. Seriously.
“Thank you.”
“What’s wrong? You don’t need to thank me. You’re the one who rescued me, Boxxo. Thanks!”
All I can do for her is follow along with whatever silly things she’s saying, but she always smiles as though she’s happy with that, and that’s enough for me.
My situation is baffling: I’m a vending machine in another world. But I’m starting to think this kind of life isn’t all that bad. If I had a face, I’d be wryly smiling right now.
It may be a strange environment, but if this is what my days will be like, I’d like it to stay this way. I really would.
