Chapter 15: Her Smile
Golden Week has started—for many, it's a holiday. For me, though, it’s the furthest thing from a holiday. I'm going to be helping out with organizing the event for the first years. I don't have anything to do 'till 1:00 p.m., though.
I'm just about to start preparing my clothes and anything else I need before I go out, but my phone starts buzzing on the table before I can start. I grab it and see a few new messages I haven't read yet flash on the screen. Meh, it's probably just junk mail... Oh, wait, no—it’s from Touka. I wasn't expecting her to text me. Maybe she wants to talk about what happened yesterday?
“Meet me at school roof pls.”
Wow, that's pretty cold. At least the message is easy to read, though it kinda hurts that she's being so blunt.
Whatever. I guess I'll head to school, then. I have to go there eventually, anyway, so going a little sooner won't make much of a difference. I don't really know exactly when I should be leaving, though. She didn't really specify a time for me to go, after all. I guess I should ask her.
“What time?”
I send her the message, and she reads it almost immediately. I wait for her to answer. 10 minutes pass, but nothing. Has she left me on read or something? I know it takes a while to write a text, but 10 whole minutes? Come on.
Wait… don't tell me she wants me to go now? Ugh. Whatever, man. I guess I'll get going now.
☆
Once I arrive at school, I immediately head toward the roof. The door’s still busted, so I just burst in. Touka's already there, and she's looking down at the courtyard. She probably heard me busting the door open, because she turns around to face me. She looks around cautiously to check if the coast is clear before she says anything.
“Hey there, Senpai,” she says. There's a noticeable breeze, so she holds down her fluttering skirt with her hand as she speaks.
“Hey. What's up? What did you want to talk about that's so urgent?”
I approach her slowly, and she stays still, merely watching me get closer.
“Oh, yeah… I didn’t tell you why I wanted you to come here. My bad. I just wanted you to come.”
“No problem. So what's up?”
“...Would it be so bad if there wasn't a real reason? That I just wanted you to come?”
I don't answer, since there's definitely something on her mind that she's struggling to tell me. Finally, she takes a few deep breaths and faces me.
“Senpai! Um… I’m sorry about yesterday.”
She bows her head.
Huh, she sounds totally sincere. This is a far cry from her usual teasing and bantering. Impressive.
“What do you mean?”
“Just wanted to apologize for getting so mad yesterday, and for dragging you into that mess with Kai. That’s all.”
Wow, she's so embarrassed that she's not even looking at me.
“I told you yesterday, didn't I? Don't worry about it.”
“Well, I do, okay?! That guy was seriously such a dick to you yesterday,” she says indignantly.
Well, she’s not wrong there—Kai definitely seems to have a “holier than thou” attitude, and he's quick to judge someone without listening to what others tell him; at least, judging by what happened yesterday.
I recall yesterday's events in my head, and Touka starts fidgeting from my silence. I finally glance over and ask, “What?”
“Um, j-just one more thing. It’s super embarrassing even just remembering it. Um… wh-what you said yesterday was… It was the first time anyone's ever told me that.”
Her face turns beet red, and she looks up at me with puppy eyes.
“Yeah... That was the first time anyone had ever opened up to me like that, so it was kinda out of my field. I wanted to try cheering you up, even though I'm the king of giving up. So yeah… I don't really know. Sorry, I was kinda pulling it out of my ass 'cause I didn't know what to say.”
“Yeah, that's what I figured too—that you were totally talking out your ass.”
“Y-Yeah.”
Wow, she doesn't mince words. It's pretty embarrassing being told upfront like that that you were totally bullshitting, even if I was thinking the same thing.
“Well, your little speech still made me happy, though. Having you acknowledge all my efforts, and knowing that you have my back… it really, um, really encouraged me. Like, a lot.”
She gives me a sheepish smile, her cheeks flushed pink with embarrassment.
I'm speechless—I didn't actually expect her to appreciate my efforts.
She takes my silence as disbelief. Discontent with my answer—or lack thereof—she tilts her head and says, “I mean it, y'know?”
“I’m glad you liked it.”
“Well, if that’s the case, I'm glad, too. Actually, there's one more thing… Could you repeat what you said yesterday again?”
“I said a bunch of stuff, so you’ll have to be a little more specific.”
“Um, I remember you said you'd totally help me find something I could beat my brother in,” she answers, still smiling.
“Yeah, I did say that, and I mean it.”
Her smile widens at my response.
“Um, I know it's probably too early right now, but I actually found something that only I can do. Something I can't lose against anyone.”
“Oh, you did? Mind telling me what it is? I'll try to help out any way I can.”
So she found something she can use to fight against Ike, huh? Let's see what it is…
…Uh, okay, she’s not saying anything. With an impish grin, she shakes her head and creates an “x” with her fingers.
“Nope, my lips are sealed! Mainly ‘cause I don’t need your help with it!”
“Huh? Oh, so you wanna do it yourself without relying on others, right? I get it.”
That'd make sense. I get why she wouldn't want to tell me.
…But she shakes her head again.
“It's not something you can help me with… er, actually, it'd be pretty counterproductive if you tried. Anyways, it’s something I gotta do on my own!” she exclaims, and her eyes light up with determination.
Her face is still visibly flushed, but I think now it's because of her excitement rather than embarrassment. She's exuding such a powerful aura right now, that I find myself unconsciously taking a step back.
“I... I see. Well, in any case, it’ll be nice if you can win against him this time.”
“Yeah!”
Given how upset and frustrated she seemed yesterday, the fact that she’s up and ready to face Ike again today is really admirable. She should be very proud of herself.
“Oh, right—can you do me a big favor?”
“Sure, what is it?”
“Well…”
She takes a deep breath and looks right at me.
“Could you please keep pretending to be my boyfriend? Until you’re fed up with it, that is.”
And here I was expecting something big. I feel kind of deflated after hearing her say that.
“Do you even need to ask? I already told you—it’s fun for me, so don’t worry about it. I’m totally up for it.”
She puffs her cheeks in annoyance with my answer
“Oh, right… Sorry, my bad. You don’t really like going along with it yourself, do you?”
I should've expected that she wouldn't like it. Not that I can blame her.
We don't have any feelings for each other right now, but who knows about the future? A month from now, a year from now, maybe things might start to change. But I'm guessing Touka only wants to keep this up until she's ready for a real relationship. It makes me kinda sad, actually… I wouldn't mind staying as her real boyfriend, but I'm sure she'll eventually leave me for someone she likes. But that’s okay.
“Yep! I’ve always hated that fake relationship crap!” she exclaims as she flashes me a brilliant smile. It's one of the brightest smiles I’ve ever seen in my life.